11:17 p.m. - 04 March 2003
Z is for Zaftig
Z is for zaftig
Of all the words that describe my current shape, zaftig is the one I like best. Not just because it starts with a z, always a fun letter, but because it doesn’t have nearly the negative connotations that most of the other accurate adjectives do. I also like the unusualness of it; it’s nowhere near as fun to describe myself as fat.
Although, that’s it exactly. I’ve always been zaftig. I’m currently heavier than I’ve ever been, but on the plus side (pun unintended, but funny nonetheless), my weight has been holding steady for a couple of years now, so at least I’m not gaining anything. Much, anyway. I’m sure my bottom line hasn’t been helped by the plethora and availability of sweets in the Administrative offices, but I’m trying to be good.
Most of my problems with food I think have to do with comfort: I eat to calm myself, or to pick myself up, or to reward myself for an accomplishment. I admit, I have worse eating habits when Lee’s not here; I’ve been known to not eat while he’s on business trips. Well, maybe something small for lunch, but usually nothing else. I love to cook, too, and it’s hard to cook and not eat.
Part of the problem is my inherent laziness, too; it’s hard to exercise while sitting at a computer all day at work and all night at home. I just can’t get motivated. And I know that part of that is my need for instant gratification: the weight’s not going to come off tomorrow, so why work hard at it? Sadly, I think that’s true for me in a lot of ways other than my weight, too.
I think the thing that might get me to change my ways and actually lose the weight is wanting to have kids. I’ve already been told by my gynecologist (or as my sister calls it, the pooky doctor) that unless I lose weight, I’ll probably have a hard time getting pregnant. I am determined to be well on the way to motherhood this year, so who knows? Maybe by December I’ll be zaftig in a whole new way.
This has been an entry for AlphaBytes. I’m going through the alphabet backwards just because I can.
